His Book
by Romez
Summary: As a bet, Jiraiya would teach Naruto 10 new jutsus if Naruto helped write the next Icha Icha book. With a pen and paper in his hands, he begins his work!
1. Thought Process

Jiraiya smiled as he handed a frowning Naruto a pen and paper. "So if you finish this, I'll teach you TEN new jutsus! Sound good?"

Naruto grumbled a bit, but nodded his head. With a grin, Jiraiya left Naruto to his work. Naruto grimaced as he looked at the pen and paper in his hands, what had he gotten himself into?

"Well… I guess I better get started." He said, brightening at the thought of learning ten new jutsus. But… he had never written anything poetic before so how was he supposed to write a sex scene for Jiraiya's new Icha Icha book?

Taking a deep breath, he sat down and leaned against a tree. He sat there, contemplating. After a moment, an idea hit him. What if he wrote about all the girls he knew? What if he made characters from personalities from the girls he knew in real life? The first girl that came to his mind was Sakura and so… he began to write.

_1 hour later_

He held the notepad up in front of him and read his awesome work, but halfway through, his smile turned into a grimace of horror. Let's just say that Sakura's character wasn't the _gentle_ type. In fact, this was more of a rape scene than anything else. With a sigh of defeat, he ripped out the paper and thought of another girl. This time, it was Ino. She was pretty good looking after all, not as pretty as Sakura, but she held her own.

_1 hour later_

Setting his pencil to the side, he read over his work once again. Naruto couldn't help but scratch his head in embarrassment. The sex scene was… rather pathetic actually. In it he had portrayed Ino's character as a slut who _performed_ poorly. He didn't know why, but that's just what he had written. He sighed, back to the drawing board! Next up was Kurenai.

_30 minutes later_

He had to stop. The way this story was going, it looked more like a talk fest than a lemon. It was _boring_. Though Kurenai's character had the body to rock any man's world, the man would have to go through worse than hell to be with her. With a grunt, he ripped out the paper and threw it somewhere behind him. Then, another person popped into his head. What was that weird crazy snake lady's name? Oh yea, Anko!

_30 minutes later_

Naruto's eye twitched as he read his work. That… was just plain disturbing. At the same time, he fidgeted when he felt his pants become _tighter_ in a certain area. Taking a deep breath, he ripped out another paper from the notepad and tossed it aside. He paused for a moment and looked out at the distance. What other girls did he know? He could try Tsunade… but even though the thought of a naked Tsunade was pleasing, it was also disturbing since she was almost like his grandmother… and fantasizing about your grandmother is just plain wrong.

His thoughts then led to her assistant, Shizune. But for some reason, he couldn't even picture her out of her clothes. He was too sued to seeing her taking care of the wounded and bleeding. He simply shrugged as he continued thinking. Suddenly, Neji's teammate came to mind. Ten-Ten… hmm… maybe he could write about her. And so, after cracking his knuckles, he began to work.

_40 minutes later._

As he set down his pen, he wiped the eraser shavings off the notepad and began to read his work. He was actually quite pleased… as was _other_ parts of his body. Ten-Ten had always been tomboyish and for some reason, that just seemed to work. Assuming she didn't carry any weapons into bed, Ten-Ten made a very good lemon character. Her lithe frame and dexterity could be put to _many_ uses. A perverse giggle left Naruto's lips, startling him. Where had THAT come from? Scared and fidgety, he moved onto another girl. Next up was Ayame, the ramen waitress.

_10 minutes later_

Naruto frowned; this wasn't a lemon at all! All he had written was about the man having ramen and talking with a beautiful waitress and that was it. There was no way to progress from there. But then again, it's not like he would write naughty stuff about his family, which is what he considered Ayame as. Naruto grumbled, as did his stomach, as he tried to think of any other girls he knew. There was Moegi from Konohamaru's crew, but that was… he wouldn't even go there. Maybe Temari could be good material, but sadly, he didn't know much about her.

He sighed as he placed his head against the tree and closed his eyes. There weren't any more girls and he was sure that Jiraiya wouldn't be pleased with just Ten-Ten's character. But something seemed to tickle his mind, almost as if it was trying to tell him something. He was pretty sure there were no other… wait… Hinata! How could he have forgotten about her? But when he thought about it, he was pretty sure why. She was so quiet and shy. She even fainted when he was simply near her… well, not all the time. Those were only a few times when he had surprised her. He was pretty sure that if she was given ample warning, she would not faint.

He gave another sigh. How could he write about Hinata in such a way? Sure she had a nice face, pretty eyes and a big….. Naruto shook his head, trying to get rid of such dirty thoughts. But suddenly it him. He would have to _embrace_ those thoughts if he was going to write anything good… err… dirty. With a hesitant hand, he picked up his pencil and began to write.

_1 hour later_

Naruto's eyebrows were knitted together in frustration. He had already been at this for an hour and he still hadn't even gotten Hinata's character out of her jacket. But something within him made him persist in his endeavor. It was like something was telling him that Hinata would make great material. Now he was starting to worry if Jiraiya was starting to have a negative effect on him. Regardless, he listened and forced the gears in his head to churn out something good.

_1 hour later_

Alright… he had actually gotten Hinata's character _out_ of her jacket, but he still had yet to actually get her naked, or even semi-naked for that matter. But then the thought of a naked Hinata desperately trying to cover her intimate parts, blushing; crosses his mind. Naruto had to take off his jacket because it seemed to have gotten hotter outside. Wiping the small blood from his nose, he began on his laborious work.

_1 hour later_

Naruto wanted to throw the notepad from sheer frustration. Somehow he had actually gotten Hinata's character back _into_ her jacket. This was the opposite of what he had intended. But then again, he was trying to force Hinata's character into a situation that was highly unlikely. Then, an idea hit him. What if he made Hinata's character a stalker, or have qualities like that? What if he made Hinata's character just a shy girl who constantly followed the boy she loved? He was pretty sure the real Hinata wouldn't do that. Hinata may be weird, but not _that_ weird. Anyways, the addition of stalking seemed to have fit Hinata's character quite nicely.

He paused for a moment. How would this turn into a lemon? Well, stalkers usually follow people. So… what if Hinata's character followed to boy all the way home? It was a bit creepy he had to admit, but Hinata's character was hot so that didn't matter. It was actually a plus! Anyway, what if Hinata's character just happened to see the boy she loved semi-naked as he came out of the shower? Inspiration struck and Naruto wrote with extreme fervor after he had ripped out the previous pages and started anew.

_4 hours later_

As Jiraiya walked, he spotted Naruto lying against a tree. He seemed to be resting or something, but he couldn't tell from this distance. Cupping his hands in front of his mouth, he yelled, "Hey gaki! You done with your work? I won't teach you any new jutsus if you're not done!"

But no response came. In fact, Naruto didn't even give any sign that he had heard him. With a small scowl, Jiraiya proceeded to walk over to Naruto. What he discovered shocked him greatly. There were pieces of paper littered _everywhere_! It looked like Naruto really had been working hard, but that's not what had truly shocked him. There in front of him was Naruto leaning against the tree with streams of blood flowing down his nose.

Jiraiya looked down and proceeded to pick up one of the shriveled pieces of paper from the ground. Flattening it out as best he could, he began to read. Jiraiya smirked. It had never occurred to him to use a snake's tail for _penetration_. Though mildly disturbing, it was new and he liked it! Not only that, but Naruto had actually written a slight bondage scene. Not bad at all. Folding the paper, he tucked it away into a pocket.

He picked up another piece of paper. Almost as soon as he read half of it, he chunked it far away. Sure he had written some _forceful_ sex scenes before, but what he had just read was just plain wrong! But it did make him think. A woman forcing a guy into sex was rather appealing and different. Maybe Naruto really _could_ become his assistant. Looking at all the crumbled up pieces of paper on the floor, he proceeded to pick them up. Folding them neatly, he tucked them away into pockets for further reading.

Finally, he took the notepad out of Naruto's hands and began to read. A perverse giggle escaped his lips as he thoroughly enjoyed Ten-Ten's character. Not only was the gymnastic scene nicely written, it was something that had never occurred to him. Having sex upside down was… creative, to say the least. He flipped the page and this time, there was actually a title. It read: _The Shy Girl_. Thoroughly interested, he began reading.

Jiraiya nearly collapsed. This… was gold! Details were vital to _any_ story and this one surely did not lack in that department. Though boring and a bit redundant at the beginning, it spiked in lascivious behavior at around page 23 when the stalker girl had just seen her crush come out of the shower semi-naked. Having fallen out of the tree from being in a daze, she had injured herself. Of course, she had let out a cry of pain which the boy inside had heard. What came next was just ingenuity beyond belief on Naruto's part. The way he had written the lemon made it seem as if he had experienced it himself. He looked carefully at Naruto's face. No, judging from the stupid grin and the way his nose bled was sure indication that he hadn't experienced any of the stuff he had written. Still, he must've gotten it from _somewhere_. Oh well, it didn't matter. He would just have to ask him when he woke up. In the meantime, he needed to get cracking if he was to turn in his work by the due date.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**So I'm back! But guess what? All my work from my USB was deleted… accidentally… by me. I can't believe I did such a stupid thing! I was trying to copy my work onto my laptop and… I still don't know how it happened. All I know is that my work is gone, everything from every story I have ever written! EVERYTHING.**

**But there's no point in being mad. What's done is done. I had incomplete chapters that were almost done, but noo… they just HAD to be deleted. So, I'll give you this while I try to re-write them again.**

**Good to be back though, hope ya'll enjoy this poorly and spontaneously written story.**


	2. Word from Author

Alright, this story is up for adoption. Sorry for this guys, but I'm in college and I don't think I'll have time to finish this story.

If you want, you can take it and write it the way you want it. Make sure to give me the link cuz I want to be able to see what you mold it into :)

I'm laughing about my "What did Hinata just do!" Story because it has 210 reviews… and is STILL getting reviews even though I haven't updated in 1-2 years.

So yea… the only story I'm continuing is "Bleach at Youkai Academy" since it has a storyline and the only thing I really need to do is tweak it and mix it up a little.

Sorry if any of you are disappointed, but this is how it'll be. Till later

~Romez


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